When you try pulling the hotel blanket from where it’s tucked

Feelin’ good, wanna share the love. I’m gonna DM 3 people that RT this tweet a $1,000 amazon gift card in 72 hours. Make sure you’re following, so I can DM you. Good luck! 🍀

I’m going give someone random who retweets this tweet $10,000 because it’s my birthday and I feel like being nice ☺️ (you have to be following me so I can dm you the code if you win)

I’ve been on twitter for like 8 years and there’s still nothing that has topped Earth Sandwich

4 new songs out TOMORROW! Who’s ready?!

I hate golf. I quit golf. I can’t wait to play tomorrow.

This dude went on AGT just to sing Tequila on the karaoke😂.

Her: How many hoes you got? Me:

Another new one called "Every Little Bit Helps." Let me know what y'all think!

WHEN SOMEONE SAY YOUR JOKE LOUDER THAN YOU AND GETS ALL THE CREDIT

Merica.

Merica.

This is pure sorcery 🎱 x.com/merlinrecargad…

The Pebble x.com/complexpop/sta…