"I positioned myself as a problem that needed to be fixed, which made it all too easy to pick myself apart. There is no healthy self-esteem when you view yourself as a project instead of a person." CN: Disordered eating + symptoms, mortality stats blog.helloalma.com/2023/01/lesson…

my mom recently discovered the phrase "in limbo" and cannot stop using it to talk about me. I have not yet done my taxes. or, as Lisa would say, I am in limbo.

Today on #WWYDM, @debradigiovanni joins Nicole Byer aka peppa pig slut to discuss being single and celibate for 18 years, importing her current boyfriend, and her experience dating a feeder. Listen: listen.teamcoco.com/debra

it is very cute that my pinky toe has battle armor

Big career move! Just quit therapy so I can manifest full-time

If you don’t have to pee your pants right now you’re not drinking enough water

one of my favorite vids is this one where the guy and his sexy stepmom keep guiltily glancing over at his dead father's ashes

Me: I just broke up with my boyfriend Every man: you’ll be fine because you’re pretty Me: that isn’t how depression works, actually

I normally don't do Twitter threads, but this issue is really near and dear to my heart. So if you'll indulge me for a second. Here's a thread of real Eminem puns that are stuck in my head daily as I walk around life suffering in silence. Thread 🧵 (1/9)

We need a National Divorce POLICY. All marriages annulled NOW. #SarahCooper2024

Dirty talk is all about making plans that you simply can’t follow through on

“There are only TWO sexes!” -Me talking about my sexual history and how I’ve only had sex two times

Putting empty ketchup bottles back in the fridge is how I connect to my faith

my body is a temple in that the only people who wanna go inside are pretty lonely and expect to get bagels out of it

I don’t care about making my therapist laugh. I care about making her look disappointed in me

my biggest ones are all deleted but I stand by this one with my whole heart

Weight Watchers sounds like the name of my grandma’s Mahjong group

It’s not fair that cars get to just honk at pedestrians while we have to use our words

this is what happens when a downers bitch and an uppers bitch go to war