Today NASA was tracking a possible way out of this timeline for us all, but unfortunately, asteroid 2025 DU2 narrowly missed Earth by 337,000 miles.

With the 64th pick in the NFL draft the Philadelphia Eagles select…two chicks at the same time

Deion and Shedeur sound like a father and son who've been out drinking all day, stumble into your bar already hammered, talking about "the party's here..", and throw a fit when they don't get served. The business isn't worth the hassle.

Jumbobump

Folks who put the capo ON the fret are wrong. Fight me.

A. The show has no producer B. The producer is a moron C. The producer did it on purpose

These catty beefs are exactly the ticket the WNBA has been looking for. 25 years late, but, this will finally make catty bitches watch. Instant ratings.

The WNBA problem isn't that everyone else won't support them, it's that WOMEN won't support them.

These look very similar to actual U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials except: A. They indentify themselves B. You can see their face C. Instead of being filled with hate, they have candy in them

my boyfriend: we could start dressing up as ICE agents and escorting people from their immigration hearings so it looks like they’ve already been detained but we just give them a ride home.

Bring back hi-tops

Imagine if every horrible video you've ever seen on this hellscape had a happy ending

If you're one of these asshole morons parked in the far right lane, doing 47 mph, I hope you die in a car fire. Don't you have a doorway to go stand in, you oblivious turd?

Since when is cheese not dairy? And if you take out dairy, meat, produce, and booze, what is grocery??

Fuck Greg Abbott

Oh boy

My man is hell on the dance floor.

They for real don't know the difference between noble and Nobel, huh?

PSA: if your mom still pays your car insurance stfu when I ask for your ID you fucking toddler. Always the vertical shit...everytime. 🤦‍♂️

Butt naked on the bathroom floor sounds disgusting, Shaggy.