Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy

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Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

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The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public

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Hi @iainastewart please make sure you show up today to vote for amendment NC16 on the #hospitalclosureclause!

1 hour and 10 mins holding for customer service - what's going on VTEC is now LNER #wasteoftime

Wake up Starbucks UK Costa Coffee Caffè Nero and smell the waste. We want coffee cups that can actually be recycled NOW #wastenot