"I'm Barry Allen. And I am the fastest man alive." ⚡️ Experienced Barry Allen. ⚡️ MV/MS. ⚡️ Seeking new SL, crossovers always welcome! ⚡️ Mature Themes apply. ⚡️ Ships? Only with proper chem! "Nothing beats the feeling when your running."

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YOU MERELY ADOPTED THE SIMULATION I WAS BORN IN IT MOULDED—

I promise I'll only sit and kick my legs if we can get milkshakes and fries. Lots of fries. I'm really hungry.

Velociday

... Daylocity.

smoking will make you wheeze when you backflip

That's impossible, I'm too fast! And headbutts don't make sense, your head is sensitive, why would you use it as a weapon? What if you miss and hurt your teeth, or they have a metal plate in their head?

It comes before Feb but after Dec

That's a lot smarter but it still has the problem of me being crazy fast.

I don't have horns I have hair

If you use technology to make me go slow then that's cheating, Grandpa Barry said so.

You're not allowed to use slime either. To be fair, he didn't actually say that, I just thought that it made it sound a little more legit. Max probably said it, though.

Goop? I don't think he likes a lot of technology. He's not very good at texts.

Then what is it? If it's not tech or slime or goop. I keep trying but we both get impatient.

That's creepy. You're creepy.

Is it just me, or does Eobard look like the guy who ruined the blue bird app?

"No thank you, I'd rather just go back into the simulation, Elon."

how is that good it means you'll die

It means I'm not horny, I'm a man without horns. Just hair.