The people who complain about President Trump on social media are the same people that cry about the snow in Ohio but never move. 🐸☕️

You get ONE ride. One. Treat people with that in mind..experience life w that in mind..work w that in mind..love w that in mind. Cheers

Are you really a server if you’ve never chased someone through the parking lot yelling they forgot their take home box? Server_Life #serverprobs

No one: Me: COOOOOOOKKKKKIEEEEEE!

There’s is no satisfaction like sleeping in your own bed after being out of town. Can I get an amen 🙌🏼

Like who the fuck went to parties and fucked in high school?? Pretty sure I had a curfew and the ONE time I tried to go to a party to make out with my crush, my mother and grandmother showed up to bust me 😂

I’ve had the same phone number since 9th grade. I think that’s having your life together.

Me too buddy me too.

I imagine all the closures and cancellations give people a sense of ominousness. But it's really an amazing act of social solidarity: We're sacrificing so we can give nurses, doctors and hospitals a fighting chance. Start from there and hopefully we can figure out the rest.

This #CoronavirusPandemic is like the Purge except instead of running around murdering people, here in Ohio we are all running around ordering take-out.

Although I still had to work, I’ve never felt more at peace as I have during this quarantine shit. I’ve loved every minute of the world slowing down.

I like how all of sudden everyone thinks they “hate” the Fourth of July and have never celebrated it. Haha ok guys we see you every year with your fireworks and American flag snap chat filters. Tf outta here. #Happy4thofJuly 🇺🇸

I’m 32 years old and still scared to tell my mom I booked a flight in the midst of this pandemic. She’s going to yell at me 😭

This is the way.

You can’t have Covid if you never get tested👍🏼

*Heavy breathing* #DarthVader

They say red light helps you sleep better

Years ago I’d be closing down the bar before Thanksgiving. Today I’m watching a YouTube video how to carve a turkey. #Thanksgiving2024

The Return of the King