Breaking News: Kitten Trumps Head of Security Happy Hogan. Apparently, we’re welcoming him as the newest addition to the security team. The titular perpetrator, as pictured below, will be officially known as “Security Cheiften.” Which is a clever play off of ‘chief’ & ‘kitten’.

I better for all the dedication that goes into it.

New Single: Avenge The Fallen from our upcoming EP: Hero. The secret boyband's reunited for a comeback the likes of which hasn't ever been done before.

Typical day in the life of Tony Stark. 🤷🏻‍♂️

There is a tissue box with Gerald on it. Actually, it's a llama. All technicalities aside, it's a box with Gerald on it.

Seduction is an art. Said by someone. Somewhere. Possibly me. GQ always knows how to make hum-drum photoshoots fun. Thanks for this one, lads.

Wow. This has to be what, mid to late 90's?

When Pepper tells me I've got homework and steals my champagne.

Are we the cool kids yet? It’s worth reiterating that that no one does silver fox Hogan and Stark better than ...well... Hogan and Stark. 🦊

It’s a fact that pin-stripes are a never go out of style classic. I don’t make the rules ...well. Actually. I do.

Does anyone else dip french fries in their soup? Or is that just me?

How @MotrinNotAdvil and I explain to our house guests that we put up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving ft. big and extravagant presents for Pep.

Accurate. And fixed it so it was accurate. Ahem, @MotrinNotAdvil

Don't you have episodes of Super Nanny to return to, Agent? 😏

Happy Thanksgiving from everyone in the Stark and quasi-Stark family. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. 🦃🥃

When @MotrinNotAdvil has to discreetly try to pull me back into line on national tv.

Twitter, we really need to have a talk. I realize I'm Tony Stark but this is outlandish, wouldn't you say?

I spent the entire morning thinking it was Wednesday. This is humiliating ...among other things.

Still alive. Just tinkering and planning Pepper’s Christmas gift.