When you’re goin fast let one person be faster.

this is going to be the television event of the century

Billie Joe Armstrong With His Sons - I Think We're Alone Now youtu.be/2QnHjkBD_YI via YouTube NICK

The Who - Substitute youtu.be/eswQl-hcvU0 via YouTube I was born with a plastic spoon in my mouth

Garbage men should use roller skates to collect trash they can skate down the street and get there job done twice as fast and once they have 1000 hours of skate time they can audition for my musical I'm writing "Garbage men on Ice" live at Disney World

If you shake a man's hand 7 times he will ejaculate

"I Can't Explain" - Live at the Royal Albert Hall youtu.be/Lnzl6qkIc_M via YouTube nick isidori

Going on a cig run Lucky Strike Reds are 3.39$ a pack !!!

i ordered southwest siracha mayo on my sandwich theres a fucking bullet in it

someone stole my car lol

after 7 months of research i finally know what finna means its a type of casserole

i dont have obama phone but i have a biden beeper it gives me the number to any pop pop in a ten mile radius just dont call these men after supper time 3 pm

i put in applications for you free loaders on unemployment work starts tomorrow 4 am at the morton salt plant in florida get ur boots ready grab a shovel

It's not weird to invite someone to a picnic LEGALIZE PICNICS FUCK COVIS 19 im g3ttin sick of this !!!!

im calling instashart for my groceries i need 15 pounds of roast beef potato chips and toilet paper immediately

Actually I am VERY interested

i didnt even take apart my christmas tree from last year its been up since last christmas in my kitchen not a lot of places u can store a 7ft plastic tree i also dont know how to use a screwdriver to take said tree down is it lefty loosy or righty tighty please help me

phone broke i can only tweet or telegraph from my headquarters i just need a dogecoin to get outta this mess www.gofundme/jameshillsnewphonefoundationforhope.com/donate

the time has come for me to watch my one football of the year

Got jumped by a bunch of street kids gave them 8 dollars