My 3yo found a harmonica during bedtime. MY 3YO FOUND A HARMONICA DURING BEDTIME!

3yo: **jumping on the couch** Me: Stop jumping on the couch 3yo: YOU MADE MY HAIR ITCHY! Me:…

My 3yo was angry with me because she couldn’t go out with me AND watch TV at the same time. I hereby admit that it’s all my fault.

Whoever designs clothing for kids really needs to be aware of the pure hatred my 5yo has for the tags on the collar

Today, I told myself to “take it easy” in the midst of all the parenting chaos and I did. The world didn’t end. Will I remember to do this tomorrow? Probably not.

I’ve been tired all day and my morning coffee finally decided to do its job…at 1am.

New year, Same laundry, Same dishes…

My 3yo is mad at me because her birthday isn’t the same as her older sister’s… Send help!

My 5yo has informed me that when mommy reads bedtime stories that she sounds cuter than I do. I don’t know what I’m meant to do with this information.

I just finished doing laundry…FINISHED! This has to be the twilight zone or something.

My kid: What colour is a polar bear’s skin? Me: White? My kid: Wrong! It’s black! What colour is its fur? Me: White? My kid: No it’s clear! You need to go back to school.

Me: Good night babies My almost 6yo: I’m not a baby anymore If anyone needs me I’ll be in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably, while picking up the pieces of my broken heart.

3yo: “Alexa play nshxhdjebvrhekdif” Alexa: “Playing Cheerleader by KIDZ Bop Kids”

The Little Mermaid… but it’s just my 3yo refusing to end the bath time she initially didn’t want to have.

Poof… Just the sound of me disappearing for the day…from the people I love the most. Happy Mother’s Day!

“Mommy you’re beautiful and pretty so can you please get me lucky charms?” My 3yo in one breath.

Have kids…so they can tell you how yummy cucumbers dipped in ketchup are!

What does “𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗶 𝗶𝗻 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲” mean? Asking for a mother of an almost four year old.

3yo: Mommy I like your dress Me: Thank you **A conversation I never knew could take place, while wiping my kid in the bathroom.

Peace, Coffee and Quiet. The reasons I rise and shine before my kids.