“I can see myself in his head”

“I need greens to my face”

“A bucket of cheese…incredible!”

“I need more convincing so I’m setting my cookies up”

“hey Phil McIntyre do you want some nachos”

“They still have the hoodie!? Wait no I’m not going to buy it. I can’t” *5 minutes later” “Do I need to buy the hoodie!?”

“What if I use my Christmas cash…then it’s not real money. Right!?”

I promise I’m not capping I wouldn’t do that to my goat

“I’d make a terrible hostage”

I would’ve made a really bad bulimic in high school

“Who is it” “uhh idk white dude from the tv”

Cheese pull to the ceiling

“You get her a hot dog, or a cousin of a hot dog….”

"unfortunstely, it is my monkey"

🚨 | Jonas Brothers earn their first #GRAMMYs  nomination for their song "Backwards" (in my house)

“Honestly…get babies stuffed tits!”

“I want this done to me…I want to be a nut!”

I use he/ham pronouns

“When can I EVER get gay chicken!?”

no bones emily