Fuck everyone whose selling squishmallows online for 3x the price

I’m about to order a cat stroller on Amazon and not tell my partner so when they come home one day they will just run into me walking down the street with Bub

I made Jell-O shots last night and everyone was asking if I was having friends over or having a party. Is it a crime to make them just for me on a Saturday?? 😅🤔

forgive your younger self. believe in your current self. create your future self.

Ya girl saw a squishmallow today that she did not have and did not buy. Let’s drink to that 👏🏻

I’ve come to the conclusion that social media is only for me when I’m under the influence, you’re welcome

hand sanitizer that smells like a doctors office and not tequila is now considered a luxury good

My therapist told me today “we are only needy when our needs aren’t being met” and they way that’s sat with me all day.

Did I have a bad day? Did we somehow end up with 5 new squishmallows in one day? Idk

If my cat magically wonders into my virtual job interview do you think I’ll automatically get the job??

feel your feelings. no matter how big or small they be. if your feeling happy, tell someone, cherish it, you might help them. if your feeling sad, tell someone, they might help you. 🖤

Not me fighting with my cat again because her other parent isn’t home and she won’t go to sleep without them

My favorite thing about retail is saying hi to a customer or asking if they need help and having them look you DEAD right in the eyes and ignoring you

The girl at the McDonald’s drive thru told me I looked really cool tonight so that’s a plus on my day

Okay but what happened to having friends and having fun?? All we do is work and fucking stress ourselves out now that we are all adults

I said I wasn’t gonna drink during the week but just one margarita might make my sleeping meds work better 🤔

LIFE HAS SUCKED FOR TWO YEARS BUT ITS FINALLY MY HELLA MEGA WEEK. See you guys in NY, Boston and next week in Hershey!!! Fall Out Boy weezer Green Day Hella Mega

Last night was night one down of Hella Mega , I feel like I’m 90 but I’m SO READY to do it all again tonight

I understand we are trying to save the turtles from choking but paper straws really make me upset

This is my first year in 6 years of NOT working retail and NOT having to work Black Friday….this feels illegal