“Hm?”

He points the empty pistol at Alastor “Hand, gone” He re-cocks the pistol

“Try me, Charlie”

*click*

He stares blankly at Alastor as he disarms him

Acid

“The fuck are you doing”

Heavy squirming “Eh, no, put me down, no” He is flopping around violently in Alastors grasp

“This was expensive shit put me down, I gotta wait like 2 weeks to do this again to make it worth my money, put me down”

“Fuck you you’re giving me $20 then, this is good shit” Scratching now

“You asshole, I’m a grown fucking adult, I fought in two wars, I killed people, so fucking what if I wanna drop acid, I have earned the fucking right”

“I’m an adult who can what he fucking pleases. What have you done other than being a terrifying emotionless god of death? Why do you get to dictate what I do with my life? I understand I’m your slave but that means I work for you, not live by you!”

“Who the fuck are you, James Madison”

“Yes it is, I’ve seen things no man should see. I’ve seen children dying of starvation, I’ve seen people for covered in flaming napalm, so what if I want to take a soft drug”

Jesus Christ

“Do you think guns are supposed to be civilized?”

<— on how way to out cunt them both