Being into guys and smoking weed is a ridiculous combo! It really is! I just tried to smoke some of the kief from my grinder, but I ended up contacting Keith from Grindr! Yup. It's official. Marijuana mixed with an interest in men is a recipe for disaster! Hijinks WILL ensue.

Unbelievable series of words

Man I just woke up butt naked in my bathroom

demi moore, drew barrymore, lucy liu & cameron diaz, 2003

i was born to smoke weed and eat pussy

Men be like “are you ok? And if you are ok can you jack my penis off until completion?”

Scaring the hoes with esoteric wisdom and knowledge

"...so Kalos posted for the sixth time: 'how it feels to be a high school janitor.' " "Haha, classic Kalos. And then what happened?" "Nobody thought it was funny anymore." "AHHHHHH NO STOP TOO SCARY AHHHH."

"Yarrrr, matey. I am but a scurvy dog. I do not think I shall make it to landfall." "Squeeze me, PirategaChad. Partake of mine lifeblood, and cast me starboard to a watery grave." *Squeeeze* *Sluuuurp* "It pains me good friend, to see you become naught but jetsam."

Scaring the hoes by being too oblivious to all the signs and cues they are giving me to make a move

Niggas be internet Catholics but watch BBC cuck porn in the down low what’s up with that

Making a nervous Gulp noise before eating pussy

*Knocks up your bitch* "No hard feelings, bro."

lili Too pee or not to pee Is the question most important Waste not but fill my flask With thy bladder's precious content

Shower sex fucking sucks dude! The drain be hurting my dick! I have got to get a girlfriend!

I’ve consulted the brain trust here on X: The Everything App™ and we have come to the conclusion that BBC cuck porn is “Based and Christpilled.”

I’m in the gym to fuck fat bitches 😭

I don’t care how saved u r u gone get horny