Lizzo gave us hot girl summer

My favorite part of the day is when Jack and I are trying to fall asleep and I ask him about what we should have for dinner the following night.

Nothing is cuter than hearing boys talk basically ‘girl talk’ with each other. Like “how did you know when you liked her?” Etc #flyonthewall

I’m sad that being a therapist means I probably will always be excused from juries.

Forget having flying dreams, I had a dream where I was telekinetic and it was the best moment of my life! 10/10 highly recommend

Bumpers up or I’m out.

If #Euphoria is #relatable, I’m never having children.

My diet starts on Monday and I feel like I’m playing a game of “how much can I eat before then?”

Can #eboys grow a beard?

I don’t know what #discord is and at this point, I’m too afraid to ask.

Eyeballs? More like dry balls. What I’m saying is my eyes are dry.

What happens when a mailman gets a package for themselves? Do they deliver them themselves or does their mailman friend think “you go Jerry!”

I showed my man tik tok, now he’s as obsessed as I am, so now when I go to show him the good ones I found, I’m met with “saw this”

Is being an adult just always having a little bit of a cold?

I don't understand when people say "let your hair down" for relaxing. My hair has been down all day. It needs to get the hell out of my face if I'm trying to relax.

Happy Valentine’s Day to me!! #jaclynhillvolume2 @Jaclynhill

The worst thing about the boneyard match was the dementors #wrestlemania

It makes me sad that none of the girls on #TooHotToHandle could find a bikini top that fits. The beautiful are suffering too, people!

Have you ever spelled something so badly that google comes up with ZERO results? #proud #accomplishment