Finally done with school and being under guys dicktatorship. Thanks for the mems gtown Chris and Guy you can both fuck off tho.

If our class couldn’t get Guy fired who will? #FGJ

I can’t believe no one can smell what we left in the ceilings yet 🤔

Thank you for the wonderful opportunity to posses this famous account. I will try my best to fill the shoes of my previous owners #newownership #firstpost

You can’t possibly tell me this is okay for our counselor to post this Michelle Pliska You saw it here first: Michelle Pliska hates straight people…absolutely outrageous

Some important news just breached my brain today and it is quite embarrassing for the whole garretson community. Sorry for the loss of everyone that died in the underwater submersible. But we know damn well what happened… #weightlimitexceeded #DamnDaniel

Guy Johnson has finally turned up off the coast of Spain following his incident with the submarine. The picture below was taken by a former foreign exchange student that we all miss dearly. #Spain #HotGirlSummer

Breaking news:: A student, who will remain anonymous, was taken into custody today after a report was made by other students saying a firearm was in their car. A .22 long rifle was found aswell as ammunition, knives, and a pellet gun. Please leave your guns at home in the future!

Who let the kids out of the trailer park??

We sadly could not successfully get rid of guy… but we got the next worst in line! Congrats Michelle Pliska, you get to count down your days!!! 👋 #Nomore #HappyHoliday

My mom getting me ready for class tomorrow because guy won’t call off school (I put sugar in his gas tank)

If enough of us get frostbite tomorrow we can sue the school and get guy fired for endangering students… #studentlivesmatter

BREAKING NEWS: Several GHS students were found outside with severe frostbite while attempting to make it to school. It is reported that said students will be filing a lawsuit against the school for forcing them to come to class in such freezing conditions. #getwellsoon #toocold

Calling your ex’s new girlfriend a box when you look like this is crazy

BREAKING NEWS: Two GHS seniors were caught skipping class so they could go to McDonald’s for lunch… #dumbdumbs #WhatWereYouThinking

BREAKING NEWS: A GHS senior was caught trying to buy alcoholic beverages at stop and rob…without a fake ID.

guy…please make the call…I’ll turn myself in as the owner of the account if it means we don’t have to go to school tomorrow.

Any else notice how weird it is that Bella Sysa never gets posted on the Garretson Barstool?🤔 #suspicious #weird

BREAKING NEWS: After seniors had their skip day this Monday, the school decided to extend their last day to Thursday before graduation instead of Wednesday. Hope guy and McGregor are ready to have some eggs for breakfast on Graduation day😋#seniorprank #fireguy #getegged

Anyone else think it’s weird that it’s almost August and guys contract hasn’t been renewed?🤔 Could this be the end of his horrible dictatorship at GHS? #byebye #gtfo