comic: poisonman

Excerpt from my latest novel: "Well, I think I am going to go for lunch now, and for my lunch I am going to have my favorite food, which is McDonald's," John said. "Yum," Jack replied. "That is my favorite food too." "I hope you have an awesome lunch today," Brad added, smiling.

Hey man, its me, ur dasher; 😁 if your food is a little more watery than your used to, dont worry. Its because I used my water syringe on it 😁 it makes your meal squishy and juicy! Anyway, enjoy your crunch rap!

My favorite place on the Internet

just my luck to get fired from Goldman Sachs for deciding to stop supporting Genocides right before what is apparently the one good genocide

You're missing out on good shit like this

i have spent a lot of time envisioning a porno named "Death Bed: Final Suck." it's about a dying straight man who regrets never sucking dick

[walking in on an Eyes Wide Shut orgy] hey uhhhhhh do any of u guys know the wifi password

I know two different Jewish dominatrixes in Berlin. One is pro-Israel and the other pro-Palestine but they are both releasing the worst music you can imagine right now

President of Omelas posting a picture of the kid and saying “Heartbreaking. This is not who we are”

any time anyone makes some super generalized statement like "bi people do xyz", they're always just talking about one person in specific that they know. "Cis men with bowl cuts are obsessed with the battle of teutoberg forest" - that's just Carl. That's not a thing. It's Carl

You know, the President and I may disagree on key issues, but you’ve gotta admit: through deliberate and careful diplomacy he is succeeding at making the sun rise earlier and set later every day

guy that has t shirt of sam hyde with an AK47: i sincerely believe the infinite chocolate thing works

Lostpedia is the coolest website in the world. Imagine if TVTropes were entirely written by people who also thought they were solving the Da Vinci Code

Check out my webcomic i Genereated explosm.net/rcg/odqsfkpsx