Sarcasm. Because telling people to go fuck themselves is socially unacceptable.

We get to celebrate 2 new years but I still feel the same. I still want to smash some people's face when I see them. #fuckmyproblems

Appreciate what you have, until time makes you appreciate what you had.

Everybody makes miscakes.

When your poop stinks so bad even you can't stand the smell.

They laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at them because they're all the same.

Relationships without trust is like a phone without service. You just play games.

I just need a hug from someone, someone who will also bring me chocolate & who will say: "You'll be okay. Also here's 5 million dollars."

My exes are living proof of how stupid I once was.

Happiness is a three-day weekend.

Emotionally constipated. That feeling when you haven't given a crap all week.

If you don't like me and still watch everything I do... You're a fan.

If I had your grammar, I'd kill myself.

So many things to do. Not enough money.

Better days are just around the corner. It's called Friday and Saturday.

Last name Hungry. First name Always.

Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the "M" is silent.

I don't pretend to be something I'm not. Except for sober, I've pretended to be sober sometimes.

Whoever said nothing is impossible is a liar. I've been doing nothing for years.