dating me is like taking an edible. you don’t know when imma hit you

cheating on MEGAN THEE STALLION when its mfs out here that would fight 45 grizzly bears just to be within a 100 mile radio her is insane…

matter fact i’m slapping every lightskin nigga i see on the street today in solidarity

just locked my nigga out the house, yall gone pay for what you did to Meg..

I want his ACL on my desk by monday.

this is so hard😭😭😭😭 klay thompson😭😭😭😭

"Oh, do you think he was referring to you?" will go down in history as one of the most brilliant interview questions ever asked.

This is why I love Threads because sksjsjsjjsjdjsjsjsj 🤣

Sketchy guy came up to me and my bf and I hid behind him but I’m huge and he’s tiny so we look like this😭

Just walked by a person with drawfism (I think??) and she was MAYBE up to my bellybutton. I wonder if I look like a Titan to her

The concept of my short ass hg towering over anyone is crazy

I hate Cassie so much why the FUCK is she making me agree with Nate

Life is just an endless cycle of doing dishes, laundry and going grocery shopping🫩

Just watched a movie that I’ve been wanting to watch and my wife was randomly in it?! I sensed her presence🤏🏽

Roomie and I were trying to find a movie to watch and I suggested this studio ghibli movie I hadn’t seen yet and she agreed a little too quick…it was Grave of Fireflies🥺 she set me up💔

pet play but you open the door and i run into the road and get ran over

When I die, please cover my casket in my sticker collection that I bought but could never commit to applying on things

I’m so sick of my roommates. If you can’t take the trash out or clean up after yourself then don’t touch the fucking thermostat!