Not that it matters, but SL never force choked the head investigator because of the collusion investigation. It was over a different matter entirely!

General Hax has said something well for once in his life. x.com/AngryGenHux/st…

Look, we'd love to NOT kill all of the Jedi, we really would, but it's the LAW and everyone knows the Emperor can't arbitrarily change a law he's arbitrarily made... unless he really wants to. Which he doesn't.

Of course I support #womenintech. You think that idiot Han Solo bypassed the compressor?

Kumail Nanjiani I agree with Sean Hannity. What part of I tripped and fell unconscious while the girl Rey killed Snoke and 8 guards by herself is so hard to understand?

@HamillHimself For the last time, Leader Snoke was killed by the Jedi girl alone! There was NO COLLUSION in any PHONY HUT INVESTIGATION.

SL has consistently held to his claims that there was no collusion with the Jakku rebel girl. I for one, see no reason to doubt him.

The benefits of working for the SL are indeed superior to anything the rebel scums can offer. x.com/DepressedDarth…

ugh i hate this picture it doesnt even get my good side the dark side #OldHeadshotDay

The trifecta’s dopurrgangers. x.com/BadMotherLeia/…

Yes, blowing up Alderaan was probably awful BUT have you heard the mean jokes this leftist comedian made about Darth Vader? #Disgrace

Remembering the day Darth Vader broke down on the Forth Road Bridge #MayTheForthBeWithYou #MayTheFourthBeWithYou #StarWarsDay

The Supreme Leader has assembled a special task force to investigate—everyone seems to have developed a slight lisp today. #MayTheFourthBeWithYou

Star Wars Avengers Or just a good bucket

Calendars marked, sir. Blasters at the ready. x.com/DepressedDarth…

Supreme Leader is still investigating the mysterious outbreak of lisps. #maythefifthprevail

In response to the recent (overwhelmingly negative) coverage of the Snoke murder collusion investigation, Supreme Leader has revoked all media licenses. All headlines now require direct approval from SL.

There will be no special Mothers’ Day mail delivery for stormtroopers. Your mothers sold you to the First Order for an extra ration and a half. Supreme Leader is your mother now. #HappyMothersDay

Please welcome our new press bullpen intern, Darth Derpidious Beluga. She is wearing uniform Darth Vader #5 robes.