Wembley we’re ready, are you?

THINGS JANUARY IS LONGER THAN 1. A stretch limo 2. War and Peace 3. Long life batteries 4. Mr Tickle's arms 5. A horse's face 6. The DFS sale 7. The time ripen-at-home avocados take to ripen at home 8. Peter Crouch lying down 9. The distance The Proclaimers are prepared to walk

February 7th. No wind. No rain. No snow. A suspicious nation walks around still wearing their hats and scarves. They're not falling for February's tricks this time.

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the sky is blue. But it is April, so take a jacket, to be safe. And an umbrella. And maybe some spare socks. Galoshes. A wet suit. An inflatable dinghy. An ark featuring two of every animal. And your sunglasses, in case it's nice.

Emotional & moving programme with @Vicky_McClure #ourdementiachoir very close to home 😞😣♥️ but lovely idea

I can’t wait for the latest episode of ‘Celebrity Wife Swap’.

Oh, Harry. You are a hero. 😢 #DDay #DDay75thAnniversary #DDay75

"I always wash my hair for stuff like this..." 😂🚿 🌸 We LOVED BLOSSOMS in BBC Radio 1's Live Lounge 🌸 Listen back in full on Sounds 👉bbc.in/2Kbocxz

No. YOU’RE crying! x.com/ahmxdmayed/sta…

August is almost over. Make the most of the last few days. Wear flip flops. Barbecue your cornflakes. Put a towel on your chair to reserve it. Eat ice cream at every opportunity. Say "it's too hot". Get sand in your shoes. Immediately regret getting sand in your shoes.

IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO THIS AFTERNOON: 1. Make a cup of tea 2. Have a biscuit 3. Think about maybe replying to that email you've been ignoring since last week 4. Register to vote 5. Have another biscuit gov.uk/register-to-vo…

When veteran Bill Champion was asked what he thought of during the two minutes silence, his answer is a haunting reminder of the sacrifice made by so many... #ArmisticeDay

THIS THIS THIS OVER AND OVER AGAIN. THIS. Please watch and share. Brilliantly and simply put.

EIGHT MORE TO GET. 50 minutes remaining. I *think* we’ve got Djibouti, Kiribati, Niger. Steven our listener whose stupid idea this was in the first place will do the UK. So. We need Guinea Bissau, Mauritania, Tuvalu and Uzbekistan. URGENTLY! #UpYoursCorona

So they're telling us CHIS stands for 'Covert Human Intelligence Source'. But what if CHIS really stands for 'Clearly H Is Steve'? Makes you think #LineOfDuty