da fuck is this

ey da fuck is goin on, da guy who hangs around with da “THE END IS NEAR” signboard swapped it out for one what says “I TOLD YOU SO” did somethin happen

back in my day da snacks used ta be plentiful at battin island. just dropped on da fuckin ground. but oh now. NOW. suddenly dey’re all “fuel” for da “spaceship” so “we don’t get caught by the black hole” feckin ridiculous i bet it’s dle blasio’s fault

yanno da air pollution in new yorks really gotten outta control, can ya believe da sky is black an blue now? its bullshit is what hows a boid supposed ta see

ey does it smell like peanuts to anybody else all a da sudden

well i aint entirely sure of the state of da universe right now but dats new york for you right eeeyyyy

what i wouldnt give for a fukkin dirtwater dog right now

ey if anybody makes some a dem recipes from the moody cookbook can ya drop the crumbs on da sidewalk for a little boid like me

ayyyyy did ya ever think dat dis pigeon would be one a da best batters in internet league blaseball lookit me vinny

Management has given us instructions to "make it five games long for the views". To this i say, "listen, i am an unpaid intern. i do not control the players on the field."

a guy asked me, ey fletch, did ya see you have maxed out drama, howsat happen? and i tell im, vinny, (he says is names not vinny but he can stuff it) as a pigeon i gotta stand around an den flap off in a panic the moment somebody steps one inch too close. a course im dramatic

-sigh- Day 102: Former Pies Player Yusef Puddles crashes into Wild Wing Fletcher Peck. #blaseball

OW WHAT DA FUCK WAS DAT

can you believe da fukkin indignity. whats da world come to that a boid cant even play some blaseball without a guy fallin from da sky and squishin him into da ground