I heard a girl at the bar last night drunkenly ask the bartender “what’s the closest drink you guys have to a chicken nugget.”

“babe we have guests, go get the fancy cups”

100 investors, college athletics and Anheuser-Busch: How three brothers built Super Coffee into a $400 million company trib.al/NelPLWS

the CDC said if you’re fully vaccinated you can change your hair and you can change your clothes you can change your mind that’s just the way it goes

The CDC said my mom will take us if yours will pick us up

was it the plastic straws

My brain to the name of the person that just introduced themselves to me

The greatest storyteller of our generation. 🇺🇸🇺🇸

This is the greatest Twitter thread ever

Meet Peter Genyn An hour before the 100m final, he found his chair sabotaged by a competitor — 3 flat tires & a broken frame. "Someone must have been terribly frightened.” Rather than give up, Genyn used spare parts & duct-taped his frame together. The best part? He won gold.

Tomorrow I’m opening my first grocery store in a Title One school. I doubt I sleep tonight - imagine a parent between checks who can order dinner and breakfast for their family thru our app and their child bring it home. I’m changing lives man, no one does it like me. Just wait!

Yeah that’s the main thing about this photo

Sara Blakely sold fax machines door-to-door and started Spanx with $5,000 in savings & no experience. She never raised money & has now sold a majority stake in the brand at a $1.2 billion valuation. The best part? The gift she gave her 500+ employees to celebrate. Amazing 🙏

LSU Madison at night Rose Bowl Iowa City Tennessee

And by the way people will not get me to trash Iowa. I love Iowa. It’s one of the favorite colleges I’ve been to. You won’t catch me saying a negative thing about them besides Casey’s General Store pizza is trash.