Oh my GOD, people are going to think that it's me! How much does one of those Travolta/Cage face changes cost, anyway?

It's a clever disguise, isn't it? Do you know how expensive plastic surgery is? It's insane! *Twirls her moustache in agitation.*

*Closes the shop for the night, since nobody's come by in the last few hours.* There is not enough alcohol in the world to fix tonight. Ugh.

That's not entirely true. I know hundreds of very bad people. Hundreds of hundreds. Several thousand, really. x.com/PensiveSoldier…

@PensiveSoldier The bad people who enjoy being bad certainly do. It seems nice knowing what you are and going with it.

x.com/SeekSearchFind…

What's that word for the feeling you get when some strange account begins favoriting posts from a month ago? Wiggins. That's what I've got.

I can't say that I'm enjoying this case of the wiggins very much. It's making my hands sweaty and my stomach uneasy.

I just don't understand humans and why they make things so complicated all the time, and no one will explain it to me!

The shop's closed for the night. Go away, now.

Twitter, I will not add my birthday. Even I know that's a rude thing to ask. Well, I know it now.

I don't see why a demon has to be your enemy just because you're a demon. Some of us are almost neutral. x.com/sixwordshort/s…

Like Switzerland, with the chocolate and little, tiny knives that come with cork screws and emery boards.

Oh, and very annoying clocks.

No, demons are not annoying clocks. It was a simile.

...That's a pop culture reference I couldn't possibly hope to understand, I assume. I think it's very rude when you do that.

I don't sleep on vengence, I...oh, that was another one, wasn't it. ...I don't want to talk to you anymore.