No one: Me 4 shots in:

Bro saved his buddy cause he got knocked out sky diving , this the most fast and furious shit I’ve ever seen

This just happened, and maybe this is where it all ends: Got an elevator with 3 people. One guy (with his wife), sarcastically: “anyone ever tell you you…” and stops. Me (amused): yes, but you’re the first today. His wife: “I’m sorry, I tried to stop him from doing the joke”

Our #OpeningDay roster is set. #RingTheBell

this is what peak human activity looks like

when i check my bank account and realise it wasn’t fraud, it was all me

Out here getting jumped financially

sorry

Dad’s taking the divorce well…

OMG OMG WE DID IT WE'RE NATIONAL LEAGUE CHAMPIONS

I ain’t know giraffes ate grass like this 🤣🤣

also nothing more weirdly American than wrecking a scooter while blacked out with your friends

Relatable

Congrats on your sand castle buddy, let me know when you have an 85” 4K LED TV with access to 7 hours of commercial free football

Imagine your vehicle is turned over. You’re disoriented. Wondering if this is the end. You turn to your left and see Hollywood Hogan in his NWO shirt saying “gimme your hand, brother!” What a mindfuck.

Step foot in my shoes🤲🏾 theplayerstribune.com/posts/michael-…

Strong minded & strong willed Mike Penix Jr. knows what he’s made of

Nick Nelson strikes out Cristian Pache with his knuckleball.