He sounds like me and I’m suffering some major laryngitis. Yikes.

If only people could have foreseen that this was a bad idea. #debate

The monologue portion of this play is particularly painful. #Debates2024

This feels like a trap.

Thoughts on rewatching #IndependenceDay 1. It had to be a lot smokier in that cockpit from those cigars. 2. Put Bill Pullman on the ballot. Either as his character or actor Bill Pullman. 3. Harry Connick Jr., movies called, they want you back. Take a break from Australian Idol.

Got a call from a doctor's billing department that I owed $1,600. I just asked what was it for specifically? She said, one moment, came back and said: "That was wrong. You don't owe anything." Can I get "store credit" for whatever cardiac damage happened while I was on hold?

Time for plan B

MAGA deciding between Cancel Netflix and their need to watch the Nickelback documentary.

My cat judo kicked down the door to my babies' room. And I blame #JDVance.

Too many things I’m obsessed with. Just one big SSRI.

The coconut tree has been shook and everyone has fallen out. #earthquake

Human alert! Human alert!

We need to give a ton of fing props to these firefighters. They're amazing. I didn't even make my own coffee today.

People, people hide your dogs!!!! #Debate2024 #PresidentialDebate2024

It’s true when I delivered my girls, the hospital sent down both breastfeeding experts and exeuctioners. #PresidentialDebate2024

If you’re going burn someone you better nail it. Awkward vibes. #imspeaking #PresidentialDebate

Trump just got Swiftly shut down.

So how does future President Harris get her MAGA hat? Trump can write it off so I’m sure he’ll follow through with it. #PresidentialDebate

Lila gives us a good reminder of the danger in seeking a return to old normalcy after a huge crisis (with her usual eloquence). Also reminds us how health care shits the bed when it comes to women. Check out StuyHealth

Melania just chucked a molotov cocktail of a reveal on her abortion stance. 👀