Very annoying how Eileen won’t just come on

It is legitimately a spiritual experience when I redownload and open the Masters app for the first time every year

Women hate that men are so simple

Rickie looks like he’s getting ready to wrangle a small but dangerous animal

My son, 7, has discovered “deez nuts” jokes and it’s all he says now. Everything is deez nuts. He simply can’t stop. I asked him where he heard that joke. He made me promise that if he told me, he wouldn’t get in trouble. I agreed. So he leans in and whispers, “deez nuts.”

awareness level: 0 drunkenness level: 98 fireproof superpowers: 100

If you want to actually learn sales, save that $5k you were about to spend on a course and just watch this masterclass.

Football is almost back

This Hard Knocks is going to give me a dangerous amount of confidence in Dan Campbell and the Lions this year

Lucky Gambling Squirrel. If you don’t retweet you’ll have bad Gambling luck all season

The kicker for East Carolina can never show his face on campus again

The prevent defense is the worst thing to ever happen to the sport of football

The #packers absolutely refusing to invest in our receiving corps

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I’m dying 😂😂😂😂😂

Unfortunately this is how all economic theory is written. Need to make a TON of assumptions to explicitly solve for variables. It’s up to the reader if they agree with the assumptions or not.

The Zoo is closed today due to a serious situation.

Why are the Jets doing this to me personally.