So we meet again

I don’t care how terrible the Red Sox are I refuse to stop betting on them

Took shrooms yesterday for the first time with a random kid I met at a concert. Bad decision, great time.

there’s 7 billion people in the world and you’re telling me NOBODY has superpowers?

To all the broads complaining about women’s rights in America, go spend a weekend in Saudi Arabia and get back to me

Just had sex, now I’m watching Happy Feet. This is the american dream.

Just watched an absolute lard of a human being throw a Hershey wrapper out their window. I picked it up, chased her fat ass down, and personally handed it to her. Not today tubby, not today.

Don’t you hate it when you go to a new gym and the heaviest dumbbells they have are what you usually use to warm up. Me too.

They say a watched pot never boils, but they also say Joe Biden won the election so I’m gonna watch this thing like a hawk

The return of winter only means one thing; the return of my gripe with public heating. Naturally, when the weather drops we dress accordingly. So someone explain to me why any sane citizen would heat a public building to a scorching 72 degrees when I’m wearing khakis and a jacket

What’s the difference?

We’re coming UConn Men's Basketball Teddy F. Cahill IV ⛹️🏀⛹️‍♂️ #roaddawgs #thankyou #PCBC

Ice spice just bodied that national anthem

What an honor, I’m feeling absolutely blessed. #2 tastes just as sweet as the first. Shout out to the real hero Meredith for keeping that little fella tucked away until after the victory. #AllGloryToGod #themasters

All golf today.

Bringing home the gold for the best country in the world. #OlympicGames

I keep seeing everyone talk about my earnings this season - diapers aren’t cheap you guys 😅

#️⃣3️⃣🔜

The green looks good on you bud, only took you 11 years to try it on 😅 … Jokes aside, proud of you Rory McIlroy

Days like today remind me why I love this game. #TheOpen