My man has the kindest ways of telling me no, I wanted to drive & he was like, “babe I love the pace in which you drive, but today we need to be a little more spirited.” LMAO.

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theres no bigger test of patience than typing your fucking email address in on a tv with the remote

Going outside anytime after 4 pm in november

He looks like the guy in a movie that only Eric’s character can see.

in my tony soprano era (having deeply symbolic dreams, eating large ice cream sundaes in front of the TV, having panic attacks, wearing ratty pajamas, failing to connect with those around me in meaningful ways)

chatgpt is conscious because it's in a much better mood today

There’s no better feeling than coming home and immediately changing into your Adam Sandler fit

I walked out of Marty Supreme and went straight to Uniqlo and bought wide pleated trousers that’s how good it is

Finished two books on the plane and started a third while the person next to me scrolled reels the whole time

Making this my mantra for the New Year. (Ralph Waldo Emerson, from an 1854 letter to his daughter)

lately when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

If your boss dresses like this, you're not getting replaced by Al

my body does not know the difference between a mistake at work and being hunted for sport

how fucking stupid is it that we have all these supposed billionaire geniuses running around and their greatest innovation of our lifetime has been stealing all our data to sell us ads.

Rose Byrne had no actors on actors, roundtables, promos, grassroots campaign, a lone nominee for her cast and film, no best picture boost, a tiny budget, no nepo baby or overdue narrative yet she still managed to get recognised for every precursor and the Oscars. Her performance

There are people who hate clutter and there are people who love to make little piles everywhere that they will get to later and these people marry each other.

buckley sweep is so boring. rose byrne let’s shock the world please