Husbands first comment to G winning #Spoty - ‘if cycling is actually popular why does everyone try to run us over!’

Test results are back. I am indeed 75% mince pie now.

If you’ve ever wondered if the law of attraction works just fart in an elevator. #wisewords

Think we all know there’s a quick add mass lie about to happen on #mfp

I’ve had some absolute shockers in terms of Christmas but this one has been the best. Watching surprise and delight on our children’s faces is second to none as they think Santa’s been grafting, bless. #joinin

Want to watch #birdbox. I am precisely the worst person to watch #birdbox. #completegirl

Damn tapas. Tapas everywhere is doing a ‘wtf?’ look and wondering why it was involved in this ridiculousness as it slowly backs away nodding.

😂😂

I have genuinely witnessed my 17mo negotiate snacks better than #brexit

It’s 2:07am and I’m an hour now into trying to settle her back into her bed and not on me. I’m now dreaming of a leisurely brunch with a mimosa as she will OBVIOUSLY sleep seamlessly until 11am now right in thanks for my efforts

I’m 40 mins into #AbductedInPlainSight and already I’m shocked at the stupidity of these people. This is Brexit level stupid.

Just kondo’d my wardrobe and honestly I feel post-coital.

#trailblazer 💁🏻‍♀️

Hollywood offers Prue his cream horn, waits for Razzle guest editor call. #gbbo

💁🏻‍♀️

Everyone in my house: “sleep if you’re tired! It’s so important for training, Y U NO SLEEP” Also everyone in my house: “please stay awake with me though all night long”

Me every Run session 🙈

Amen. Take your LIVELAUGHLOVE signs with you.