i'm slouching in my chair and watching videos on my phone with the brightness all the way up. i'm dehydrated, my skin is dry and i'm abusing advil. my fit is trash too

give me a tote bag so ridiculously large that when i’m looking for something and say “one second,” i climb inside it and you just hear echoes and stairs like it’s an apartment building in there.

hamburger help us

I didn’t know this, did you? Amazing!!!

went into dominoes and said "pizza pizza" they shot me in the chest with a rifle

thinking about the matte blue scooby doo fruit snack

Hockey puck size Reese’s cup coming out of the beaver gas station at 520 calories and 56 grams of sugar. Pick it up before you drive your Camry 145 miles to stephensville texas … America the beautiful

an awkward hair length detaches you from your ego and brings you closer to god

driving barefoot feels like when they connect their hair to the dragon in avatar