One sec while I laugh my ass off. I won a most welcoming crew trainer trophy at canes

I pissed off a Karen today. It really motivated me to go work out so long story short hot girl summer has commenced

Girl at the bar was wearing Rachel Green’s shirt so I hugged her. We love a good friends Stan

The ants got me bad today guys

Took some old clothes to uptown and got 7$ why am I not surprised

What’s up with all these shark ads

You ever wake up and just feel Fleetwood Mac vibes. No? Just me? Okay

Wanna play two player Crossy Road? Kay Glass

Dating apps are so stupid because like if you’re like me and hate small talk it’s just like a waste of time. So like basically I’m gonna be alone forever is my point here. that’s all

I literally woke up to the most gnarliest Charlie horse of my life. I’ve truly experienced pain

Sty on eye. End me

Some kind of “sugar daddy” tried to slide in my DMs. I only have one question…when did I ask? Like no gtfo

Life motto of the day: you know what that’s fine.

Just saw two depressing tik toks in a row. I’m gonna take that as a sign that I should just not. You know? Kk bye besties

At chick fil a looking like a hobo. The guy insisted I get a brownie and I said you know what yes.

What sane person looks at a bathroom stall door and says “you know what I’m gonna write something”