One of the worst things a jig can be is up.

when my beautiful friend becomes single i shall run the conclave for her next bf

If no Pope is decided after 4 sessions, each cardinal alternates possession from the 25 yard line. After 2 more sessions, they have to go for two-point conversions.

CHICAGO POPE

the pope from chicago receiving a message from god

relationships/adopting your partner’s interests is so funny cause what do you mean i’m sitting here shouting wolves in 5

.Layton Giordani just threw tf down closing out the first night of EDCLV. Give the man his flowers!! 🪩

i hope this email kills us both

And you know what? HE WILL EVERY TIME

the mailwoman in my neighborhood carries dog treats with her, and when we pass her on walks she tells my dog, “you’ve got a delivery” before giving her one 😭🥲💙 U.S. Postal Service

"i asked chatgpt" "i asked grok" well i just made some shit up and people believe me because i'm well read and use big words

mommy? mamacita. a mom of what. a dog? like in real life? like a daughter, like a real baby? wait that’s so cute. how old is he or she

i don’t play about my nonverbal time

at the club asking for ibuprofen

i was born in the right generation i love posting on my story and ignoring everybody

Arc fest? On you mean, Midwest music week

Me when my friends are wildin: