If I sit here long enough on this beach with a full bag of Cheetos puffs.. I’m bound to make friends.

Catherine said she’d like to see me jump our fence and never come back.

Never felt so encouraged as when the male health insurance rep wished me “good luck” with childbirth 😑 ...thanks?

The church is not a museum for pristine saints, but a hospital ward for broken sinners.

Woke up very excited to get 3 hours straight of sleep. Help. Need better standards. 😴

Perks of a baby who doesn’t sleep long: 4 month sleep regression won’t be difficult 😴

No one has ever wanted me as bad as LA fitness “wants me back”.

Rule #1 for traveling with kids: don’t do it.

I bet not many of you have turned the oven off and opened it with your big toe today #momlife

Parents of toddlers: everything you say can and will be held against you

Was shopping at Costco and said “now that’s a steal” as I placed it in the cart and my son now thinks it’s okay to steal. #parenting

Told my kid not to touch the wet paint. He licked it instead 🙄

(Lazy) Home ownership is... hoping for high winds to blow all the leaves out of your yard.

Who in the world thinks of these things? Yes, of course it does dummy.

Just tried to drink water and missed my mouth. Any ounce of athleticism is officially gone.

Got called “sir” at the grocery store the other day. Time to start wearing dresses.

Paul Millard Eric Nadel Big hacks only for Cy! 🎙️: Eric Nadel

Christians need the gospel as much as non-Christians do.

Amidst all of the craziness 2020 has brought, it might be my best year yet. A chipotle just opened less than a mile from my house. 🙌🏻

Be like Devlin.