the worst person you’ve ever met is on their twitter priv right now claiming you were the problem

I love when people find out I meant every word I said.

Love seeing raccoons eat out of my trash bin. Go ahead brother im done with that stuff

lois was right to ragebait him cause look how good he looks

This is who I imagine when I see people using AI

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skillset I simply wasn’t born with.

After years of development, we're finally releasing the virus that makes you gay.

My mom instead of admitting she was wrong 💀😭

i promise your soulmate is your coworker

i’ve got people holding grudges against me for shit they did to me

men get in one fight with their girlfriend and unblock you

live laugh love ass White House 🙄

John Cena it seems ive grown quite fond of you though there are no sexual urges or desires you come to me as a long lost friend whom i once picked apples with in papas orchard

Come over ily ily ily