My drug of choice is whimsy

Whomever has my voodoo doll, please give it some electrolytes

I am about to hit 700 days, and I may do exactly this. #Duolingo #ukrainianlanguage

They should make an antacid for regret

I assure you Indie Sleaze was real, and everyone who ever went to a Har Mar Superstar show knows it.

Dress for the job you want.

It's time. mcsweeneys.net/articles/its-d…

Choosing a house to haunt may be my most direct path to home ownership.

Happy International Perogy Day! Since it is a day to celebrate one of my favourite dishes, it is the perfect time to look at the history of the giant perogy in Glendon, Alberta! It looks tasty enough to eat, so let's learn more about it! 🧵1/7

Well, well, well, it's all my chickens come home to roost.* *library holds available at my branch

The children of the future will work in jobs we can scarcely imagine today.

Moving tip: don’t learn how to read

Buying tickets to the Nutcracker and realizing you only know the Care Bears version of the story.

I saw goody proctor dancing at the pink pony club

No one ever takes me up on my excellent costume suggestion for their infants.

It was the blurst of times.

Should I try to work on myself as a person or just buy another new winter coat

marina abramović