Looking for a new job. Can be lured with the promise of a knish.

Sooooo… do I have to go back into the house to get my stuff or do you think someone could do that for me???

Feeling seen

I’m not moving.

I was so worried you would run out of meme content. I’ll see you all on campus soon!

i like it when you say that. m

Mess is an understatement

Waiting for the day knish is the wordle

I’m not very good at this game

They don’t exactly let me make those decisions anymore…

And I thought I was heartless

Happy to announce I’m being reinstated. Thank you to all my supporters for your help in restoring my position.

If I were still President they’d play the Billy Magic video at orientation

Well this is awkward

Tell me you live under a rock without telling me you live under a rock

And I thought my leaked messages were bad 💀

My statement regarding the firing of my counterpart, the (ex)President of #OhioState: “I was fired first. Stop trying to copy me. I am the LEADER and BEST. Ohio State always trying to follow in our footsteps. Go Blue!”

More like Purdon’t

All I’m saying is even I didn’t sue that quickly lmao wtf

Wanted to personally thank President Ono for making my handling of the 2020 GEO strike seem reasonable by comparison