I'm pretty sure I'm connected to the moon.

What was “the incident” with your butler growing up?

Gave proof through the night that our minion was still there 🫡

first good ai joke

Thank you Jimmy Carter for the mortgage rate increase 🙏

SETH NO!!!!!!!

this website kinda feels like that strip mall you still go to because there’s a really good vietnamese place but every other business has closed or is a bail bondsman or whatever

Leaked photo of heaven is going viral on social media. No wonder Christians are so determined to get there! 😍

gonna be hilarious if xiaohongshu is the app people actually call "x"

The government is banning TikTok because dudes are rocking too hard on that platform, and they’re trying to silence our brothers

Chinese Tik Tok (Red Note) has allowed me to preach the good word of American Culture…. I am a diplomat.

Every time I see Xiaohongshu I think of Fiveish 💵

RIP David Lynch

Bring the mall home now?

Let the bodies keep the score, let the bodies keep the score, let the bodies keep the scooooorreeeeeee

Well, Toontown is fucked

Happy to see another male president—that’s one less man out there messing up our instacart orders! 🙌

This is the stupidest day in American history, a record that will be broken by every subsequent day in American history.