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need a girl like this

Doing a lil evening reading. 🫶

Waffle House is a more compelling case for the existence of God than any word written on any holy book in all of history.

real ones know we have moved beyond 5 inch shorts and entering show some ball summer

Green Room

70 degrees so I put on the 5” inseams for a walk through the neighborhood

I have got to get back on my shit in the gym, otherwise the muscle-mommy adjacent women will never perceive me.

Real

Some of the information in this video, even some adults don't know... Did you know about the last part?

I’m Okay with this outcome.

How about you listen to the words of The Edmund Fitzgerald, you dumb bitch 😂😂😂

Missing Tied Down (again) and missing Sound & Fury after finally going last year is my 13th reason.

Me and who?

𝕵𝖆̈𝖌𝖊𝖗𝖒𝖊𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 🛸 I’ve already ran four miles and crushed a Coke Zero. It’s not too early for me.

I walked into my buddies room, saw he wasn’t home, told his Alexa to fart one hundred times right in front of his roommate and then promptly left.