i’m locking in as soon as covid’s over bro

nephew told me ufos are unc slop. hard pill to swallow but he's right.

i lowkey fuck with how there’s no jobs and rent is infinity money and food is infinity money and fun activities are infinity money and every kind of side hustle is completely flooded and everyone’s angry and mean all the time

— rolling stone, c. 2001

Just learned today that a platypus doesnt have a stomach and just eats shit for funs 😭

If you’re a man in college living with other men you should be playing catch at least 3 times a week. Football, baseball, even a tennis ball. You need to be playing catch

As a kid this is when I knew that California was the center of the universe

I’ll take the thot daughter

Pine Barrens

I couldn’t learn to code because it wasn’t player shit

You a nasty mf if you be eating ham & cheese hot pockets.

Your honor but you know I get active

Once i see them blond eyebrows in 2026 I know you nuts fr

A woman that wants to suck your dick vs a woman you had to ask to suck your dick, that’s two different dick sucks

All that deactivating IG stuff is a red flag. #mentallyunstable

i’m finna be 30 and ion think i ever bought a random woman in the club drinks lol

I love not having kids I can do shit like spend $600 on a hat

Thin line between simple and basic 🤣