i must do it

Me: What do you think is the best adaptation of A Christmas Carol? My dad: I think the one from the 1950s is the best, by far. What do you think? My brother, interrupting sternly: and do NOT say A Muppet Chri- Me: IT'S A MUPPETS CHRISTMAS CAROL I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

You want me to participate in capitalism? The thing that killed Scrooge??

CDC, 2020: wash your groceries CDC, 2022: you can cough in someone’s mouth if your boss says it’s okay

Monster Hunter is so cool because the monsters don't have healthbars. Instead you have to look closely at their actions. They start breathing heavy, they limp; Some pull out pictures of their loved ones and openly weep as you're striking them down. Little things like that.

i hate when ppl are like “i love winter!!” well now my fingies are cold. happy now ???? is this what you wanted ??

Minecraft proves that abolishing child labour was a mistake. The children yearn for the mines.

made u a cake

Headed to the barbecue in my July 4th outfit:

A photo of me going into work with a tummy ache

a single stick of deodorant costs more than the federal minimum wage and y’all are still saying it’s individuals fault they’re living in poverty

did I ever tell you guys about the time I talked to a psychiatrist and he said I would probably be fine if I just stopped reading philosophy so I did and it helped

Anyway “queer is a slur” is a dogwhistle for transphobia pushed by old TERFs who hate it for being too inclusive and tricked a whole generation of young people to parrot that thought. It’s been reclaimed since the late 80s, it is common academic. Outta here with this, Guardian