Picked up that split like Pete Webber. Who do you think you are? We am.

Shifty

The stunt in this tweet was performed by an untrained professional, so for your safety and the protection of those around you, do not try urban kayaking at home. ☠️

I'm sure someone will remind us tonight as if we are unaware!

Samad! Let's gooooooo!

If you've ever asked me if I was hot, you owe me a present for #NationalMascotDay

Aw shucks 😊

Splash day preview

In honor of John Hancock, every baseball I sign tonight will be from stitch to stitch

"Hey DJay, can I have a ball?" Yeah kid, have a blast!

Maybe I should swing by on Sunday after all

Postgame x-rays came back positive for THAT DAWG IN HIM

I'm here but where is everyone?! I've been excited for us to host a World Cup match since they announced the schedule a year and a half ago. I just assumed they meant TD Ballpark. #FIFAWWC

"That thing has air conditioning right?" Me:

Kid #1: DJay, why do you have shoes? Kid #2: Because birds deserve shoes!

Nah I read the script

We are 47-0 this season in games that end with us having more runs than the other team don't @ me or X me or whatever it's called now

"Hey look, a duck!"