So far I’ve seen wolf spiders, scorpions, praying mantises, many many kangaroos and had a shark swim up to me on Christmas Day

2025 is the year of leaving people behind and I’m gonna start 2026 battling wolf spiders in outback loos but it’s still better than what I had to handle with in 25

Brooooo

women’s intuition is WILD. she’ll say, “something feels off…” then days later, she sees EXACTLY what her GUT already knew

I’m so happy that I fucked off to Australia for 2 months

I’m getting £500 compensation for the flight delay so I’m vibing with 2026

Dear god, Australia and no weight of stupid men in my life changes me

i'd use my last breath to say something completely out of pocket

Had a Manc uber driver in Australia and he was just talking to me about cocaine prices and how he has a weed grow Nice to see Brits don’t change when they emigrate

Fell over yesterday and kept my pint upright and an Aussie bloke told me that was the most British thing he’s ever seen

Third date and I’m meeting his friends WHAT

i understand why so many artists kill themselves at 27

5th date and he’s paying for a spa hotel room. My bar has been set SO LOW to the point that this is the first time anyone has ever been this nice to me

Sex with goats 🐐 👍 👀

Kind of Qantas to take me off the direct flight I’ve paid extra for and plonk me on a connecting flight to Singapore Cheers guys!!!

I have finally evened out my hands, today is a good day