I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little disappointed that my pho delivery guy, the guy who asked where I’d been after I went 3 weeks without an order, the guy who had someone call me one time when my food was running 5 mins late - my guy - didn’t notice or ask about my hair.

So my Messenger app is seemingly unusable as of this morning? What did you guys do to it?? Are you releasing a fix?? Currently crashing every single time I open to view a new message (not hyperbole - literally every single time)

Great reminder from Amber Peebles @ the American Express Business #SummitforSuccess: “luck comes to the ambitious”. You need to set yourself up for it and opportunities will come your way. #TeamAmex

I haven’t tweeted in a year but I had to come back immediately for the first “falling in love with you” already declared, publicly, on THE FIRST GROUP DATE how DARE you, sir #nothankyou #gtfo #TheBachelorette

Much as I love Alabama Hannah going ATVing in all white (and I do love it), I feel the need to acknowledge that her wardrobe is provided by the show while Tyler’s isn’t 😬 #TheBachelorette

I’m really uncomfortable with this obsession-as-love dynamic playing out SO early on SO strongly with two men already. Rooting for Hannah to get past these manipulations very quickly 🙏🙏🙏 #TheBachelorette

Why are we doing a clip show episode of #TheBachelorette right now? Is this because ABC ordered more eps and they didn’t have more eps? That’s what it is isn’t it? 😪

Austin fam FYI @patrickmfrasier

I live to serve x.com/helenstravels/…

Definitely a secret Brit sam wang CC David Rosenberg x.com/SoVeryBritish/…

This positioning for Snapchat's glasses is brilliant IMHO. (and esp smart compared to Google Glass' "behold, the future!" storyline)

Great piece. Also Tom Buontempo we are definitely getting these in coral right? wsj.com/articles/snapc… via The Wall Street Journal

When you can’t contain your excitement about the Eagles

If my fellow marketers could please stop sending me men's clothing catalogs in the mail that would be great, thanks.

When you’re 30 and at a bar that’s already too loud and they turn the volume up x2 and you want to die

OH in the WV: “maybe I’ll just find a partner who’s ok w/ a free-range roof baby!” Spoiler: it was sam wang re: future baby playing on roof

Just fulfilling city folk stereotypes over here in PHX, calling hotel concierge to take care of a cricket chillin on my bed in my room. Didn’t even have time to overtip the woman who came by, grabbed the cricket in her bare hand, and walked out within 10 seconds.

Aka a Seamless Grubhub problem

Thank you Not Rachel and all the cast + writers involved with making my Crazy Ex-Girlfriend dreams come true in the form of this hilarious and endlessly entertaining show tonight #crazyexgirlfriendlive

Sincere shoutouts to the two girls behind me who sang along to every song (as should have EVERYONE) as well as the dude in G22 who was apparently one of 5 guys at #CrazyExGirlfriendLive who wasn’t brought along by a girlfriend