David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile
David Edwards

@dedwardstravels

ID: 979647530727301120

calendar_today30-03-2018 09:12:27

19 Tweet

396 Followers

802 Following

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

This is a controversial tweet, but Tescos museli is a total con. This evening I counted 28 raisins in one bag.Alpen is 82.You do the Maths.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Sat next to an OAP on the bus today, she was ‘bursting' with stories. I missed my stop, I was so engrossed by her London Blitz anecdotes !

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Just had a glorious dream, I was riding bareback on a donkey in Blackpool with Claire Balding.Claire was holding onto the reigns, as I held onto her with dear life.It was intoxicating!. She's worth every penny of my TV licence fee.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Last night I went speed dating. Didn't find love, but made 14 great new friends. I strolled out of Yates Wine Lodge feeling like a Champion. That's enough people to start organising Sunday morning 7 aside footie. Its a win, win situation.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Watching Y.Tube & wondering whatever happened to Roland Rat? He was just a natural TV Star! If Schofields still around, why isn’t Roland?

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

This afternoon, I went to the park & flew my Mr T kite. It looked amazing - B.A’s face hovering above the trees & houses, like a 'Guardian' looking over Brighton!

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Had a dream last night, where I relived a school time memory, when someone stole my sandwiches and replaced them with a note that simply read 'Cheers for lunch you big blonde boll**k!' Kids can be cruel.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

The neighbours dog has just messed on my lawn AGAIN!! Here's a tip for those of you having to constantly pick up K9 poo.Leave it to freeze over night, and then go around with a large barbecue skewer stick and start picking it up.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Last night was filled with very unsettling dreams - at one point I dreamt that I'd turned into a hawk-man? Half bird of prey, half David Edwards.I soared through the sky whilst defecating in mid air - it was incredibly liberating.I really recommend it.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

A chap in the gym asked me if I would SPOT THEM, whilst they lifted weights.It was wonderful, I really felt part of the gang.For him it was slightly less positive, I really need to work on my upper body strength and emergency first aid procedures

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Locked myself out of the house today, but through great perseverance managed to push myself through the cat flap. It was very satisfying, it felt like I was being born all over again. I very much recommend it.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Just got off the Oblivion Ride at Alton Towers. its NOT for the faint hearted. I lost 4 pounds of loose change from my chino pockets & then an additional 2 pounds of body weight through abrupt vomit explosions.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Witnessed 2 GBH Seagull attacks today. Brighton is turning into a Hitchcockian blood bath. We can't be dictated to by these white winged brutes.

David Edwards (@dedwardstravels) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I’m currently considering hiring a dating coach for weekly tutorial sessions –going to different locations such as a Pub, ASDA, queuing at the Post Office and with professional support interacting with women. Anyone had any experience of this service?

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Call out to my followers! If your bored on Bank Hol Mon, I'm planning a solo trip to Legoland. PLEASE, come along & join me. I'll be stood underneath the life size lego giraffe, wearing matching 'Hulk Green' coloured chinos & fleece, with a welcoming smile.