Listening to the announcers for elite level diving is like listening to seniors attendings as a junior resident at case conference. Me: wow, that was impressive, looks pretty perfect! Them: “See how much they overrotated? That’s really going to cost them. Just devastating.”

What do you mean you only have this slightly different but equally functional version of my favorite retractor?!?

The fact that Rivendell doesn’t actually exist

Me telling myself that I’ll go to bed early tonight

Me at the OR charge desk, about to wreck the whole schedule with an add-on:

“If you sustained a valgus impacted intracapsular femoral neck fracture tomorrow, which treatment approach would you prefer?”

Helen on her way to Troy:

I like to think that if they had known how many times I would have to type in a username during the course of my adult life, my parents would’ve named me something more convenient to type on a standard keyboard

I just saw a sign outside a fireworks tent in the parking lot of a liquor store that said “Drink The Booze And Light The Fuse” and OMG DON’T DO THESE THINGS SIMULTANEOUSLY

“Hey Dr. interLocks, why do you do <random thing for which I have no objective, only anecdotal, evidence>?” Me:

Cake for the price of a pi

Colleague had to bring their kid to work while rounding so there’s a small child touching EVERYthing in the work room. Kid, holding up pen: eww why is this sticky? Me: oh honey, we never ask that question in a hospital Kid: why? Me: bc you don’t want to know the answer

{overheard in the OR} RN, to general surgeon: “I’m not an a$$hole. I’m hemorrhoid—I’m here to irritate a$$holes”

Breaking news out of the Shire!

🎶 I’m working late, cuz I’m a surgeon I look so cute, here with my add-on 🎶