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It’s just the flu with a better publicist I heard Geno Bisconte

Yo Mike Cannon you fucking slayed me last night man, so damn funny! Shout out Creek and Cave for being dope as always

I’ve heard of whiskey dick, but ecstasy dick? Shout out that nice lady that let me crash at her crib last night, I’ll be sure to sit my penis down and give it a firm talking to about this later, believe you me

Every time I re-download dating apps, I’m instantly overcome with a reminder that I look like a 12 year old alcoholic with a Jew fro, zero muscle mass, and translucent skin. I don’t know, I thought I wore it well

Reppin that merch though, one of my favorite shirts! Comment Etiquette #BIGMONEY #SALVIA

Did y’all know that “The Guy From Saliva” is named Josey Scott?

Retweet if you’re horny 👅 for Freedom 🇺🇸 👄

Sometimes you gotta look in the mirror and remind yourself that you have indeed had sex before and frankly should start acting like it

In the words of the late great Bernie Mac “I’m blessed”

Remember when AKON was the biggest name in hip-hop for like 2 years? I miss being 10 years old is what I’m getting at

God damn, I’ve un-ironically incorporated the term “doggie” into my vernacular ,and straight-up, I didn’t mean too. Fuck you Luis Y’all, Fuck you you Luis. One of those things that starts silly but becomes completely real slowly. Luis J. Gomez

I started this late night down on myself and have come full-circle to straight up arrogance lol someone needs to take this Twitter account from me for my own good

Shits not loading doggie! Luis J. Gomez

#fuckyouluisyallfuckyouluis

I now understand the appeal of the fingerless gloves Big Jay Oakerson makes me feel safe and warm. Been needing to make a pair for a while now (locksmith work) and this TX cold finally kicked my ass into it. Feeling like Dice. OH!

Sizing me up? i

If everyone you’ve ever worked with, used to hang out with, or been involved with have all been horrible people…maybe the problem has been you all along.

I can’t stop listening to country music someone help me THIS IS A LOT