On a scale of 1 to Herschelle Gibbs, how much of a poes do you feel like this morning?

There’s literally priests out there having threesomes with dominatrices on the alter and I’m outchea watching Arrested Development for the 27’th time. On a fucking Saturday.

With Kobus Kotze back in town I have decided to bring #shitkobussays

I am so tired and all I want to do is just lie in Niklaas' bed, listen to Sannie Fox and masturbate #shitkobussays

Jesus this coffee is great, in Korea they enjoy serving me river water. #shitkobussays

Fourways is symbolic of our failure as a human race #shitkobussays

Internal meetings days are my fave cos track pants and flip flops.

Can we please just for once protest on Monday as South Africans and not with the “permission” of the right wing AfriForum.

Waited my whole life to announce this show.

So seriously, are ponytails really making a comeback? Once again, proof that humanity are incapable of learning from our mistakes.

Now all of us Radiohead fans all know who Lana Del Ray is.

What do bands and cocaine users have in common? Everybody knows they aren’t calling it quits forever, no matter how hard they sell it.

Remember when Afrikaans rock n roll songs didn’t feel like they were all anthems for Afriforum?

Tribal tattoos are just permanent friendship bracelets for boets who meet at Ultra every year.

White people, there’s a caucus at Tasha’s nationwide at 11am to discuss who you will moan about at braais now.

The sun was high. The mangoes ripe for the picking. And here it is, our official #OK23MangoPicker aftermovie, RT if you were there! goo.gl/cTa2sw

I feel the only way to follow the best dive of my life is to get legless at the bar tonight.

I’m definitely one of those old guys that everybody thinks is a loser for still thinking getting drunk is the coolest thing.

Times are tough for tannie Helen Zille these days it seems.