This actually happened. Preschooler walked in the room and said “mama, why haven’t you cleaned up my headband mess yet?” Me: “uh because I didn’t make the mess? How about you clean it up?” Her: “I CAAAN’T THERE ARE TOO MANY” We’re gonna be purging some headbands this weekend.

Preschooler: what’s a hot dog made of? Me: pigs. Or cows. I think this one is made of cows. Preschooler: but I thought cows just made milk? Me: … I didn’t tell her.

God said “oh, you’re night owls? You can handle a kid who doesn’t sleep then”

I used to joke about how my city baby could sleep through fire engine sirens. That “city baby” is nearly 4 screams for hours at bedtime every night now and somehow my sweet second child has learned to sleep through THAT.

I've met a lot of new industry acquaintances lately, but only a few of them in person. When I sit down with someone in person, the conversation is ALWAYS personal. I learn about their family, background, career history, etc. I VERY rarely get that in online meetings.

I said… “Don’t jump on the couch” “Wow that jumping looks like a great way to get hurt!” *kid gets hurt* *kid goes back to jumping* *kid gets more hurt* “Remember when I told you not to jump on the couch?” She says “I wasn’t jumping!!! That was a somersault!”

Just over here doin suburban mom shit. Bout to go to target at 9pm ✨alone✨

Someone in a local mom facebook group just posted that their daycare is raising the rates to the point where 2 kids will cost them nearly $6500/month for full time care. Howwwww are working parents going to survive this? Moms are f'd.

Have kids so you can be yelled at and kicked in the face the moment you open your eyes. And at 4am. And all the time really.

I got to chase my kid around in a bouncy house today. (That I booked on <24 hrs notice! In my garage! Because the party got rained out! 😅) I don’t remember the last time I smiled so much in one day. Today was a great day.

I’m sorry but “annual company pool party!” is never going to be a draw for me in a job description. (Looking out of curiosity, very happy consulting!)

Reminder to myself: The loud voices aren't the only ones that matter.

Our old Cambridge daycare is starting their fall enrollments and… 😭 I just miss them so much 😭

Man, this week is just hitting like a ton of bricks. Went into it pretty optimistic, leaving it crawling out from under a pile of rubble.

My wedding rings are missing. Thought my baby ate them. X ray shows she didn’t. Great, except I still don’t know where they are.

Tonight, in mom-brain haze, I somehow went from picking up toys to fillings the dishwasher to putting away groceries to dishes to eating a cookie to …I forgot to put the eggs away.

Oh you want to get to a barre class this morning? Welp, now your kid needs to spend 15 minutes getting their stuffed animal ready, the road is closed in 2 places, AND you’re stuck behind a trash truck for half the trip. Happy Wednesday!