Boo

"Idiot."

Narrows his eyes. "It's a term of endearment."

Suspicious Illya is suspicious. "What did you do?"

"Did you kill someone?"

He never needed a cellphone.

No one's going to call him anyway.

"Why would you do that?" Quirks a brow, hands slipping into the pockets of his jeans as he scrutinizes the American.

Why?

|| Napoleon teaching Illya how to use emojis I'm

WE HAVE WHAT NOW? did they hurt you? I'll crush their windpipes with my bare hands.

But - If they fall off a tall building ... It was not me.

Bungee jumping without a rope is dangerous.

|| LMAO Illya: what does the eggplant emoji mean? Napoleon: what do you mean, did someone send it to you? Illya: if our coworkers are hungry... They should send them to you. I do not know how to cook.

|| Illya: [writes a list] I don't understand. Why are they so hungry? Did they think I'm you???

"What's a -" Peers down at the smudged writing on his arm. "Darita? Dorita?" Squints. "Doritos?"

He's educating himself?

|| When THE Napoleon retweets the American 😂

Why is he wearing a Santa hat, and why is @TheSoloAffair grinning like that?

Awkwardly wraps an arm around Napoleon and holds a mistletoe over his head. He's not blushing. THAT RED TINT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING.