OJ Simpson died. They said it was cancer but they're hoping an autopsy will find the real killer

Can’t
I’m chewing

GOOD MORNING HUMANS

Cool
Cool
Cool
Cool cool cool cool cool cool cool coolcoolcoolcoolcool!

Did I just buy another cardigan? Yes. But in my defense I’m a grown ass adult and can do whatever I want, so

Gary asked me what I wanted for lunch and I told him the truth…
Stake n shake
Bacon double steak cheese burger
Fries
Dr. Pepper
Chilly
A dozen donuts from Krispy Kreme

* get youz heads utta the gutter
* butt sex

Mornin

the only thing cooler than not caring about something is caring about something

My teen is taking the SAT today. As we were walking out the door, I asked her if she needed a special pencil. She looked at me and said We take it on computers. The air hung quiet between us. Oh I said. Huh I said. It’s the first year she added If it makes you feel any better.

The Animals are cool cuz they are way scarier than any heavy metal band while wearing matching little suits. They’ve definitely killed people.

If you know who this is, we are friends.

I better not be the only one talking to my Alexa like I’m Moira.

Hehe😂

In case no one has told you
-GOOD MORNING 🌞
-Set boundaries
-Dont be a door mat
-Enjoy your Thursday 💥
-NICE BUTT.....😍😍😍

Sometimes I wear ballet flats just to confuse people

Mornin

Trying to organize a karaoke night in hell. So far, the only song requests are 'Highway to Hell' and 'Devil Went Down to Georgia.' Any other suggestions?

Who would you call the most stunning actress of all time?